Stop Asking Me When I'm Getting Engaged

Photo by  Julia Komarova  on  Unsplash

Welcome back, friends.

In this blog, we’re getting a little more personal. And for any gal or guy in a long-term relationship, you’ll understand what I am about to say (and maybe be thankful that someone is finally saying it).

Stop asking me when I am going to get engaged.

Yes, I get it. My boyfriend and I have been together for quite some time now (6.5 years and counting baby), but just because we’ve been together for quite a long time doesn’t mean you have the right to keep asking me when we are going to get engaged. It’s none of your damn business, thank you very much.

The Top Culprits

Believe it or not, it’s not our family’s asking; it’s friends. However, this is not an attack on them. In their defense, many of our friends are getting married or are currently engaged, and it’s a natural question for them to ask. They mean well! We get the memo that you think he should have put a rock on it awhile go after the fifth or sixth time it has been brought up.

On the flip side, some of his friends are to the point where it’s more of a joke than anything. While it does bug me, I know I am going to be a super cool wife one day that’s a-okay with you hanging out with broskis, so I only little get under my skin (a little bit).

We Aren’t Old

Listen, we’re from Iowa, and to be more specific small-town Iowa. That means everyone is married by the time they’re 23, so it’s abnormal when people are out there living their best life. We’re only 26, for Pete’s sake!

Trust Me, I Bug Him Enough About It

I would be lying if I said I didn’t say anything to him about getting engaged. I probably send the Derbear an average of 12 Instagram posts per week, all about engagement rings (three stones, all oval if you’re reading this). I annoy the crap out of him about when he’s going to propose. It has become a regular threat that I am going to do it if he doesn’t do it soon. I have even picked out the silicon ring I am going to buy him.

Believe it or not, We’re Pretty Happy

Do I get frustrated that he hasn’t proposed yet? Absolutely. But when we’re together (we currently live four hours apart), we have a wonderful time. We can communicate without talking, he buys me ice cream, we can make each other laugh, and he knows that if he wants me to stop talking, all he has to do is rub my back. We’ve got a good thing going.

But if You Want People to Stop Asking

If for some reason, whoever you’re talking won’t let it go that you aren’t engaged, trying saying a few of these things:

“I don’t know, ask him/her!”

“Engaged in what - community service?”

“We’re hoping our celebrity crushes will fall madly in love with us, so we thought we’d wait it out.”

“Weddings cost a lot of money. I don’t have a lot of money.”

“Is marriage still cool?”

Whatever you choose to go with, make sure to give it your own personal flair. And maybe if you’re lucky, whoever you’re talking to will just slowly walk away. Then you can get back to that frosé in peace.

Any Advice?

For anyone else out there reading this blog and currently living this same experience, I want to hear from you! Give me your best tips and tricks on how to handle those around you. Shoot me a DM on Instagram or fill out the form on the Contact page!

Tory Kalousek